Monday, June 6, 2011
Bhookh Hadtaal Till Death
Baba Ramdev is more popular than Facebook these days...!
Reason: He does not want to eat.
This reminds me of my own childhood days. Whenever I needed to get approval for some of my illegal expenses or wishful demands, this was the easiest weapon. Just refuse to eat or drink anything. Sooner or later the demand was met with. Oh those were the days. But I guess I could not milk those days properly. I should have asked for much valuable things. I wasted all my trials in silly ice candies, chocolates or video games, while I could have asked for land property, a flat or a bride.
But no worries...Now I have the government of India to fulfill my demands, which is much more powerful and richer compared to my parents. Now I can ask for real big things.
Thus here is my list of demands which has to be satisfied within 24 hours as per any standard quartz based clock, failing which I will obviously go on a hunger strike undo death.
1. I want all my white money back, which I have lost throughout my life either due to pick pocketing of my wallet, stolen by a thief or being deliberately given to the corrupt officials in order to gain some favor from them. Also in the same line, I want all the persons responsible for stealing my money to be traced, arrested and sentenced for life imprisonment.
2.Sanskrit should be accepted as the official and national language of India. Facebook should be redesigned in Sanskrit. In the same line, all the programming languages like C, C++, and Java etc should be rewritten in Sanskrit. Companies like Microsoft and Adobe should be banned to sell their products in India unless they release their software in Sanskrit. All Bollywood movies should be made in Sanskrit only. Anyone who cannot communicate properly in Sanskrit should be treated as an outsider and later on should be considered as a traitor.
3.All notes below the denomination of Rs. 500/- should be banned. This will encourage people to give more and more money to the beggars, as they will not be having any chillars left with them. This will also help in transferring the black money from the rich to the poor. And the most important thing. All currency notes should have my photo on one side and my photo with my girlfriend on the other side. The currency note should be a symbol of youth, not old age baldness.
4. All the persons responsible for corruption in the country should be traced, arrested and sentenced to life imprisonment.
My earnest request to the countrymen is to support me in this national cause. My appeal to my disciples is to join me in large numbers in the hunger strike undo death and make it a success, so that I get popular and bag more and more brands to endorse.
PS: Any political party who want to cash on my hunger strike as their agenda to curb the ruling government in the name of corruption can contact me through my Gmail account.
Posted by Shahzeb Danish at 6:46 PM