Sunday, July 17, 2011

Pathos of an Engineer


Engineers are one of the most underrated professionals in India. And the reason behind this, are the Engineers themselves.

“Engineers have made the life of people unnecessarily easy and simple.”

Any retard becomes eligible to use a smart-phone, just because he has enough bucks in his wallet. This is just not done. You have to be smart to use a smart-phone.

Take the case of Doctors. These useless creatures used to carry some herbs in a jute bag and used to roam around in villages to loot ailing people. We gave them stethoscope, syringe, needle, forceps, X-ray machine, ECG machine and what not. And today, these buggers are making twice the money we make.

Any common retard is enjoying all the luxuries, we engineers developed after years of hard work. And then, they underpay us for our genius efforts. We just won’t let their life be simple anymore.

How easily they read the number displayed in a bus, and cause unnecessary unimportant crowd? The number displays of public buses should read like this.
First solve the above equation and then get to know the bus number and the desired route. And obviously, if you are unable to solve the above equation, you do not qualify to use a calculator either. To buy a gel pen, you have to tell the chemical composition of the pigment used and the working mechanism of the ink reservoir and the barrel. To get a bottle of mineral water, you at least have to know the atomic numbers of hydrogen and oxygen. All the cold drink cans should be password protected after you buy them. You can get the password only if you solve the puzzle printed on the can itself. And you will get only three trials. After the third trial, the cold drink will turn into shit.

To buy a calculator, you at least have to be a diploma holder in any engineering discipline. To buy a smart-phone, you have to submit your B. Tech mark sheet along with a written test. To buy a laptop, you should have a PhD. thesis in your name. To be able to sign up for Facebook, you should have invented something of large social use or given any scientific theory duly acknowledged by Massachusetts Institute of Technology. And to be able to sign up for Google+ you should possess all the above qualities.

Jokes apart. India is not a very technologically advanced country. And the reason is that, we do not celebrate technology or creativity. We celebrate politicians. We celebrate movie stars. We celebrate cricketers. And then we celebrate corruption. We celebrate money (The commerce guys make a living out of that). We celebrate kinship. But we never celebrate technology. Mark Zuckerberg is a celebrity in America. I don’t think Sir Chandrasekhar Venkata Raman, Venkatraman Ramakrishnan, Dr. Har Gobind Khorana and Dr. Subramanyan Chandrasekhar were ever considered as celebrities in their own country. They are often referred as boring creatures in the cool language. And that is why we don’t see a Mark Zuckerberg in India. Very rarely people want to go to the research field. We are alienating ourselves from the real deal and making ourselves dependable on the cold countries.

Today, as a part of my anti-boredom campaign, let’s celebrate the spirit of technical education and let’s celebrate being engineers.